Lean In Part 2

First published September 25, 2015

If it matters to you, it matters to God. And when it comes to God, sometimes not doing is the best thing we can do.

I'm a little emotional as I write this because it deals with feelings that have recently hit close to home: how frustrating it feels when I can't fix something myself, and how scared I feel when I have to put something in someone else's hands.

In my last post, I talked about the importance of learning to lean in to situations at work, or even entire jobs, that are uncomfortable or undesirable - how when we do this, no part of whatever we are experiencing will be wasted. It may even be preparing us for something better in the future.

It should come as no surprise that when I love what I'm doing, and I'm doing good work, I seriously lean in - almost to the point of toppling over. What I mean is that it's not a stretch for me to suggest getting great at a job you're not thrilled with because whether things are good or bad, I'm a bit of a workaholic.

Work is my thing.

The problem comes when I start believing that it's my work alone that can change my circumstances. For the last few years, I've tried tirelessly to alter a course I'm on, and every time I get close enough to touch it, I wake up still in the same lane.

The truth is I can learn all I am able to about a job and do difficult things with a smile. I can be the best example of a dedicated employee and leave things better than I found them. I can lean in as close as I can get, but underneath it there is still hurt, confusion, and sometimes bitterness about the wrong turn that led me here in the first place. The only thing that will change the heart of the matter - change the heart in me - is prayer.

Prayer is leaning in to God.

Prayer is not something that comes easily to a take-charge kind of woman like me. I like my house in order, my finances in order, and especially my career in order. After all, I spend more time at work than anywhere else. I always have a plan and two to back it up. Prayer sometimes feels like I'm sitting on my hands. How can anything change if I'm not doing anything?

Giving my current situation over to prayer at first felt like a forfeiture. The dictionary defines the word as something that is lost or given up as punishment or because of a rule or law. Letting go of my 'right' to fight this on my own really felt like a punishment. I had lost. But there is a difference between forfeiting and surrendering. Surrender is the act of giving control to someone else and allowing yourself to be influenced by that person.

Surrender is agreeing to stop fighting because you know you will not win.

In all my fighting and striving to make things right, I had to reach a point where it became apparent: I am not going to win this. Not on my own.

God talks a lot about surrender. I am reminded in Matthew 6:26 to look at the birds. They never work or store food, and still God takes care of them. I am certainly more valuable than the birds. Later, Matthew 11:30 tells me that God's yoke is easy and his burden is light. Surrendering to God in prayer means that I experience a sense of peace because now He is doing the work that only He can. The work that I'm not meant to do.

And if that weren't enough, Philippians 4:6 takes all the guesswork out of it: Worry about nothing. Pray about everything.

Everything is a lot. And even work is included.

If it's something you would normally worry about, then it's fair game. Your job, your boss, your promotion, your presentation, your co-workers....I could go on, but the point is that some of these worries will be small and some will be big. Some will be so very big that they keep you awake at night wondering how one paycheck will last until the next one or how you will ever find your way back to work that makes your face light up whenever you talk about it - because it's that good.

When the worry comes in, it's time to lean in.

I just started a new Bible study that was written by Priscilla Shirer who also stars in the movie War Room. The film looks at the life of a family who seems to have it all, but is crumbling underneath. The wife then meets Miss Clara and is encouraged to establish a war room in her home - essentially a place where she can do battle in prayer.

Even though I'm only one session in to the Bible study, I can already tell this book will soon be tattered and the binding broken. Entitled, 'The Armor of God', it looks at the very real enemy of God who would like nothing more than to see me worry about work, and fight to make it right on my own, and hide in my pride so I never ask for help - so I never pray.

Just flipping through it I can see it's going to encourage me to write strategies for my prayers, to post them where I can be reminded of them, and above all, have a quiet space where I can pray them through. This will be where I lean in to God about a crushed career and hopeless hopes, and of course many other things that have nothing to do with work. It will be where I surrender (not forfeit) because I have human limits to what I can accomplish and how far I can go.

But God doesn't.

When I'm at my weakest, He is still strong. And the more I lean in to my prayers, the more I lean in to God, the smaller the circumstances will seem, and the knowledge that He will take care of it all will fill the whole room. Unlike my own energy that drains after a time, and becomes fatigued when I've been spinning my wheels too long, I can lean in to God whenever I want. Over and over. About everything. And unlike my resources, His can never be exhausted.

Lean in by praying - that is your work. Winning the battle is God's.

 

Lean In

First published September 18, 2015

I was watching an old episode of Scandal the other night. For those not familiar with the show, it's based on the life of a Washington D.C. woman whose ability to solve complex and often illegal problems within and outside the White House has earned her the title of "Fixer". When she is trying to get her clients out of difficult situations or into some better light, one phrase in particular is often on repeat, "We need to change the conversation."

In this episode, the First Lady is running for Senate, but the last city on the campaign trail was where her son had been murdered in front of her not long before. To add insult to injury, the entire speech drafted on her behalf was about her dead son. Her campaign manager (not the "Fixer") pleads with her about how much these votes are needed, and how discussing this very painful topic would make her more relatable to constituents. All the while the First Lady is wringing her hands in the air because she just can't bring herself to go. She asks her campaign manager how she could be expected to deliver this speech and exploit the death of her son. "I don't want you to exploit the situation," her campaign manager responds. "I just want you to lean into it."

Ouch.

When bad, even tragic things happen in our lives, our response is to turn away from what has hurt us. Nothing could be worse than revisiting a person, a situation, or even a memory that caused us pain. We don't want to lean into that; we want to push it away. We want to create a distance between ourselves and what is causing us to hurt or stay in the past. But sometimes I'm learning, the only way to get past something is to go through it because there's no getting around it. It's true in life, and it's true in work.

I found myself in this situation only a couple years ago. I left a decent job for one that held all the promise of professional fulfillment, career advancement, and financial stability. I quickly learned those promises were empty ones, void of any truth or substance to back them up. My daily professional life was a nightmare. Even though it's been a couple years since I left, it's still difficult to describe how I felt and what I went through. And try as I might, there has been no getting around what resulted from my choice to work there. I have to walk through it.

But I don't want to walk blindly, and I certainly don't ever want any season to be wasted.  Regardless of what I'm walking through, I want my eyes wide open and I want to be alert to the possibilities around me. I want to make the most out of the situation I'm in. I want to take something that started out as bad, and turn it into something good. No, great!

This is leaning in.

I could easily shuffle through my days as they turn into weeks and years, doing the bare minimum at my current position and focusing my attention elsewhere. But what if I changed the conversation? Instead of seeing my current position as merely a detour or a stepping stone (which it very well may turn out to be), what if I gave it my full attention? What if I go to work everyday with the idea that I can make a difference no matter where I am?

This was difficult for me at first. The job I took when I left the last one was very different from my previous jobs. I couldn't use much of my prior experience, and instead, was thrust into situations where I had to learn new things. Uncomfortable would be an understatement. I carried a lot of bitterness as a result of what my previous company put me through, and I just wanted what was familiar and to do work I already knew I succeeded at.

Slowly, I began to learn my job - really learn it. I learned it (and am still learning) in a way that not only has me feeling comfortable, but feeling like I can take it to another level - offer suggestions for new ideas, overhaul old processes for new ones with better results, and be creative with my tasks.

When discouragement finds its way to my heart, I'm reminded that leaning in was actually God's idea in the first place. Colossians 3:23 says, "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters." Long before the choices that got me here were made, He knew there would be times when maybe my heart just wouldn't be in something. But that doesn't mean I can't give it my all, because even if I don't receive credit for it, even if no one sees, and even if it feels so far from the work I love doing - He sees and He knows, and I do good work because good is the only thing my work should be. Otherwise, there's no point.

So, if you answer phones all day - answer them with a smile on your face. The person on the other end of the phone will hear it in your voice. Be the friendliest and most helpful you can be. Even if you don't have the answers; go find them. If your job entails ordering food and delivering it, you enjoy that drive and time out of the office. Maybe strike up a conversation with whoever you purchase the food from. If you spend your days in a copy room compiling handouts for a meeting -  show your boss how efficient you can be. Finish that copying before it's expected, and while you're at it, leave that copy room cleaner than you found it.

I can encourage you in this because I have been there myself. Through all the mundane and monotonous, there is joy to be found in giving something your best. And who's to say that the work that doesn't make sense to you now isn't preparing you for greater responsibility later? Maybe your sales numbers are too low to bother counting, but maybe you are gaining ground in leading or multitasking or something else that can't be measured on a resume, but is invaluable to an employer.

If you find yourself in a work situation that is less than desirable or not what you thought, don't shy away. Don't keep yourself at a distance from it. Dive in head first. Learn all you can. Get so good at it that you can be proud. Get so close to it that your perspective changes.

Lean all the way in.