The Work in Front of Me

Respectfully, I would ask that we stop interrupting women’s lives to tell them they should be leading different ones.

The Bible says that Jesus cast seven demons out of Mary Magdalene - meaning she most likely suffered from an illness not easily cured.

She contributed to Jesus’ ministry financially, so she had her own money, and there is no mention of her being married.

In other words, she did not live the typical life of a woman in that time.

I can relate.

And yet, she is the first person Jesus revealed himself to after he rose from the dead.

This in a time when women’s testimony was not permitted in a court of law because they were viewed as being lower than livestock.

Jesus instructed her to go and tell the others. She was the apostle sent to the apostles.

Ladies, you have so much more value than you’ll ever know because He placed it in you.

And that value doesn’t increase or decrease as your roles change, either at work or at home.

Imagine if Jesus yelled to Mary as she ran to share the news, “Girl, don’t forget to get maaarriieeeeddd.”

How ridiculous would that have been?

Because the message  - then and now - is about Him. Killing sin and death.

That’s it. That’s the headline.

And Mary’s willingness to be present and responsive to what He called her to is a lesson for us all.

It reminds me of when I bought my condo.

I was young. Anxious, excited, happy, scared.

And someone said, “Don’t you think you should have waited until you got married to do this?”

Man, did that ruin my moment.

And it made me feel like what I was doing wasn’t real life because I hadn’t checked another box first.

Or instead.

Would I have liked to step into other roles? You bet.

But that might be a conversation better had with the men today, many of whom seem more interested in quantity over legacy.

It can’t just be me doing all the work and dragging a guy along for the ride.

A remarkable thing about women is that we won’t wait to multiply whatever you give us.

Bring me groceries, I’ll make you a meal.

Build me a dwelling, I’ll make you a home.

Give me a story worth sharing, I’ll spread that news far and wide.

This photo was taken at one of my favorite press conferences. We made the front page of USA Today. Good Morning America even gave us a shout out.

I felt a lot of satisfaction from this effort. And I think God, like any good dad, gets a kick out of watching His kids light up and fire on all cylinders.

There are some who say I shouldn’t occupy this space. That I’m in the minority.

But while society sidelines me, God never does.

He calls me loved, chosen, valuable, and trustworthy to carry His message. In return, I do the work that’s in front me, whatever that looks like.

It could be at a job. It could be taking care of family.

It could be reminding single friends younger than me that marriage and children, however wonderful and worthy, are not actually what God looks for in the end, and then setting an example of how to walk that out, practically.

Maybe someday my life will look different. Maybe it will include a husband or a different home.

In the last few years, I’ve had cancer and the world got swallowed up in COVID.

Again, I do the work that’s in front of me.

It’s been years since this photo was taken and I still show up for God.

I bring my sickness and my singleness and the hurt I carry from the world telling me I’ve done it all wrong.

Sometimes, that feels really heavy. And I believe the lies the world has told me that I don’t have a place in it.

But then there are times I take God at his word and, like Mary Magdalene, I’m there before anyone else, waiting to see what He will trust me with next.

Eva

This is a portrait of my great-grandmother Eva.

She came to this country from Poland through a church sponsorship program in Watervliet, NY. The church would help her get acclimated to America and, in exchange, she would work in the home of one of the church members. Her family only had passage money for one person at the time, so she would travel first and then her sister would follow.

But back then the mail didn’t move as fast as it does now and as she was crossing the Atlantic, a letter was headed to her home in Poland from the host family. They were moving and would not be there to take her in.

She arrived at her destination only to find the whole house empty, except for an apron that had been left behind on the kitchen floor. Overwhelmed, she sat outside on the front steps and cried.

She was 14 years old.

Luckily, a neighbor who was a member of the same church that was sponsoring her took her in. Her sister eventually decided to stay in Poland to get married, and while they exchanged a few letters, she would never see her family again.

A few years later, she met the man who would become her husband in that church. He just so happened to be from Poland. Never doubt how God will surprise you with a little piece of home just when you’re feeling so far from it.

I’m sad to say Eva passed away before I was born. I’ll never know how she managed to get herself from Ellis Island to Watervliet without knowing any English or the fear she must have felt as she walked through that empty house.

But one thing I do know is that I am only here today because she said “what if”. Her boldness had a ripple affect through generations.

I don’t know what you’re waiting on, but I don’t wait anymore. Let this be the year you step out. Leave the familiar behind. Be the first in your family.

You’re not just saying “yes” for yourself, but for all those coming up behind you. Even the ones you may never meet.